End. Start.

My blog view for today increased tremendously.

I’m sorry to let you down by not posting my results up as soon. I got a little above what I had expected although not perfect as Amy’s was, I’m content. I really really am. I thank God, my parents, my teachers, my family. Without their love, I wouldn’t even have been alive to sit for the papers.

But honestly, PUSHING ASIDE my family members and my close friends, I’m really being nice in saying this (if you know me personally, you’d know I prefer to straighten things out, EVEN in cyber-space), it could be time for some of you folks to be growing up a little in the head. I can never get how people can be so stupid sometimes, if ever I get myself 11 As or even 11Gs, how the hell does that in any way affect your life? What’s in for me in the future, is mine. Not anyone’s. I don’t see you as a frikkin’ pop-up in my future so if you’re someone I know just by random and just by a few hellos exchanged, I really think you should start living your own life. I mean seriously, triple amount of blog views than yesterday? That’s a little overboard.

Okay, back to life. I got myself 8As. There you have it. I’m content, I’m happy. It could’ve been better, no doubt my class skipping routine in Form 4 has no doubt caused an effect to my studies. Studying in Form 5 never really was ample to cover up what I lacked off in Form 4.

Regrets? None. Well, maybe just very very a little. But I’m really really content.  Alhamdulillah. The feeling of content is something I would never ever trade, even for perfection.  I’m happy and what makes me happier is that even with my imperfections and flaws, I’m happy in my skin, I’m glad I’m me, I’m happy to be the person I’ve grown up to.

Went to Ira’s for pigging out session. Kira then came over. We headed to Tropicana City and met up with Harez. Played Daytona at the arcade and as expected, I lost. I was doing okay when suddenly EFFFFFF my car flipped and it was facing the reversed direction and there’s no reverse gear so I panicked and screamed. At least not as bad as Kira, HAHAH she wa sin second and Harez won. She actually thought the game was over so she screamed and laughed victoriously, letting her hand off the wheel. And then Ira passed her and she got 3rd place. I still got 4th. Car went reversed direction AGAINN during the second game. Headed to Ra’s and Dad fetched me later.

I haven’t really disappointed anyone I love, except Mr T whom I have yet to ring but Dan said he’d still be proud no matter what. I just don’t have the heart to tell him I didn’t succeed in scoring great for my Accounts. The other teachers I came to were happy and it meant so much to me, I really wanted the best for my parents and my teachers. Now everyone’s glad, including me. What a bonus.

Although the flaws are still there in my results slip, I’ve grown out of it, it’s time to move on with life and insyaAllah, I’ll grow up in the right pace, on the right track.

Thank you God, you have made me the most happiest, I know my results pretty much suck, hahaha, but I like what I’ve grown to become, I’m growing to a better adult and I will get closer to you.

♥ -amal

p.s Happy Birthday Pete Doherty! Although Tiya claims you’re sick inside because of all the drugs, I know you’re not. Hahahahah (:

I love Pete’s lyrics in everything. Ok goodnight.

SPM results

Results. .

out in approximately one hour.

I’m scaredd. I woke up by accident and now I can’t sleep back. Chatted with Fahmi on facebook for a while and then here I am after failing to sleep for the 2nd time.

I’ve noted most friends to not ask what I’ve obtained unless an obvious glow is present on my face. Told them to read here since this is where I’d probably curse/laugh/cry/thank.

God bless us.

End To The Wait.

I’m feeling ultimately lost right now. I don’t want to sleep. I don’t want to rise. I just got my very first pay-cheque today and I miss the people at Bangsar upon returning them.

‘haa, kau tolong mak lipat baju mehh!’

‘ha? hahaha, lepas tu letak plus dekat cheque tu ehh ‘

Mak btw is the she-male worker there. That’s what most of them call him and after some time there, that’s what he refers himself to when talking to us too! Sayangggg semua oranggg! (:

Watched a little of Watchmen with Ira and the flow was pretty slow, it was a well written movie, but not something to be expected from a superhero sort of movie. Too much talk, too little action. Headed to Muhibbah with Najwa, Hana, Ira, Faiqa anddddddd Atoy who’s back from NS! With tanned skin, not fully though, an inch from both her face sides is still fair, hahahahah! She was in her NS uniform and boots in OU. Kira fetched us halfway and we headed to Atoy’s.

Dinner was good. Kira sent me home and I got myself the longest shower, or as I had jokingly told Steph, I tried drowning myself but failed, hahahah. After soaking myself for long, and having my eyes turn red because of the water, I stoned.

And here I am. I’m really feeling lost and out of my mind.

What comes, must come. I have to be strong in taking anything. I really really just don’t wish to disappoint anyone, my parents, my teachers, my grand parents and everyone else. I want time smiling ear to ear knowing what my results turned out as.

Gotta text Ra now, need someone to ring me to wake up because I bet I’d be too darn scared to even wake myself up. I won’t be surprised if I end up sleeping or crying, I won’t be amazed if I’d chicken out.

Wish me luck loves.

Amal Zulkifar,
There are times in life when things just happen for a reason, and only when you’re lucky, you are aware of the reason which hids beneath it. There are times when you have to let yourself into a situation, even if that means you have to leave your hopes dangling in mid-air with a possibility of crashing down.  God does not neglect anyone, if ever there’s failure it’s probably because you’ve neglected yourself in the past but you always have an excuse to that, you’re human, not God.

Really, there exist times when you really have to cut yourself some slack.

♥ yourself.

My Loves.

Not everyone gets the opportunity to find that particular group of people you can share everything with. We might not tell each other everything but even so, we always know we’d have each others’ back at all times. If it wasn’t for that 11th subject I took, I wouldn’t have found them so I guess I’m happy (:

These are the ones I hang on and rely on when comes to opinions and advice. We drive each other up the wall but it always ends with “That’s just her, nanti okaylaah”, I guess we understand and know each other well enough. And I love every each of them for how they are. I’ll miss them so much and I can’t imagine life after school without seeing them weekly.

My Tangys! Jeez, I’ll never forget what we do weekly during Form 4. Wednesdays were party days. Movie marathon, Pizza, McDonalds, and we used to walk around the neighbourhood to get dvds and just food! We didn’t manage to take videos laah! ): I still remember screaming and running on the road and not forgetting the numerous times we got honked at by mother’s driving their kids home from school, hahahah!

Faiqa emo!

Biiiiiiiitch hahahah!

Irarararar!

I’ve known you since we were 4, Ikan!

Tiya doodled on Ronaldo, hahahah!

If it wasn’t for Mr Tang/the old man in the centre, (Yes, pimp!), The Tangy’s wouldn’t be existing.

Thank you Mr Tang! Najwa’s right, if it wasn’t for him, we wouldn’t be us!

Love ya, babes ♥

HAHAH GAMBAR TIYA SORANG TAKDE HAHAH!

Eeeek, No Thanks ?

I feel extremely tired but overwhelmed with guilt. Cause of guilt; I haven’t been studying and it’s not like I’m having so much fun with life either or if I see so much significance in any form of distraction but I just am, being a brat. ..

So yes, from now on, I will study study study like there’s no tomorrow because SPMs just around the corner and after 11 subjects to sit for, I can do whatever I like whenever I want. For now, it’s best for me to stick my ass at home or somewhere to study. Wait, it’s not really a huge problem for me having to sit my ass because I actually might be able to study better when at somewhere else but I really really need to be able to stick my mind and focus. I could stone my life away after SPM, please. Jeez.

Anyways, I headed to tuition this morning in kurung so yes it sucks and in heels too. Because Kira was supposed to be in heels too but she thought it was way overboard and decided to leave them in the car. So Keer and a few others were just pointing at my heels and saying “Whose are those? We should see later.” and du’oh I told them it’s not like I want to, I have somewhere to head after this. Trust me the heels did make it go a little overboard. Satin with a bunch of rose shaped thing in front and around 2-inch high? So not the usual me? But du’oh la, why would I ever get all dressed up for no reasons for tuition? -_-” Headed to the cafe near there for lunch with Kira after class, after getting myself some safety pins (my bloody kurung was so effin see-through I had to pin the upper part of it, AHAHHA), and we had lunch. And I took Zantac and Mallox before so my stomach wasn’t being annoying at all. For the whole day, in fact (:

We didn’t study as how we planned. Left for Faiqa’s after eating. Reached there and helped her a little. Went online. Tried to sleep. Went online. Kira studied while I was walking around being restless. Oh God, now I feel like resembling a 6 year old boy. Eeek. Anyways, that’s that and then it was lunch. And we had a karaoke session and makan again. And I headed home from there at 8. It’s only 9 but I feel so sleepy. And I don’t know. People are weird? Like when you go, they come? Okay, now this is scary because I’m sleepy and this is starting to sound ghostly? Eeee bye♥

Are You Mad?

I must must must, learn how to sit my bum and study. I must must quit all this restless shit. ADHD or not, it’s all in your head, Mal. Maybe I should countdown to SPM, it’d make me more anxious and study better. It might just annoy me altogether and make me feel like shit. Why do I have to be such a brat sometimes and I even annoy myself now. Okay this is dumb.

Today was fun and unforgettable (:

After so much of hassle gone through, we at last decided to just squeeze all 7 of us +Najwa’s driver into Najwa’s black Myvi. Yes, 8 in a Myvi, in a not-so-short journey from our school to Shah Alam. And let’s not even get started on how funny things got when we saw 2 traffic polices trying to control the traffic at 2 continuous traffic lights. We were there for more than 5 minutes and Yaya and Min could have suffocated trying to hide themselves, hahahahaha! The photoshoot in Shah Alam went great and really can’t wait till the photos turn out. I had a good time and thought it wasn’t at all bad that we had to squeeze in into that car because that made things a lot more memorable and just, fun (:

I’ve got a bruise on my leg because of me running to pick up the phone after procrastinating it for quite some time. I hit it on the edge of a chair btw. Ouch it hurts still. And I’m a little tired now because today wasn’t very planned and come to think of it, I just told my parents that I’d be going to school and in the end I went to school and to Shah Alam and back home and now I’m tired. I must learn how to sit my ass and study because jeez, I haven’t got much time and so I will not go to Klcc tomorrow as planned because I don’t even have a reason to go.

Oh but I’ll be baking a cheesecake on Friday so pray that it turns out lovely and I’d bring a whole lot for you guys on Saturday. Oh and I’m going to Faiqa’s place for an open house on Saturday after tuition. But then again I have no idea how to get there from tuition. If if if if if I could drive, things would be a whole lot easier. So yes, I must study while I have the time. And no, it doesn’t make sense if in terms of how they both relate to one another. I seem to be in a good mood lately, uh? Hmm.

Please please.

Why is it that I have a thing or two or more.. for John Mayer.

Okay, so I guess I won’t stop blogging altogether

Had Accounts tuition earlier and I shuffled through the iPod and asked each person to pick a name of a random guy and the song it stops at would be resembling that man. Jeez, I swear it was funny and Mr Tang was tremendously annoyed. Najwa thought he’d be getting a heart attack at that very moment and asked him if he was talking high-blood pressure pills of which he replied to with an extremely gesture. Like an old man playing monster during story telling time to his Grandchildren. Hahahah! I was bored after class so I had set a reminder on Najwa’s phone for tomorrow and the day after to remind her of how cool I am.

Oh God Mal, Get A Life.

The Reason’s Gone But I’m Still Here.

Ah ah ahh! So I didn’t wake up as planned because I had slept before 10 the night before and didn’t bother to set the alarm to ring. I had tuition classes today and I had to take a cab to the lrt because apparently walking in the compound isn’t as safe anymore, Whtf? So much to go through for abso-lutely nothing. Nothing at all. My gastric juices are slowly killing me and I really hope the pain resides because going to school in this condition is just impossible. The Ranitidine that I take might be working well on me but the idea of swallowing 2 pills that cost RM 2, each a few times a day makes me wonder if it is at all worth it. Plus, I think a few a day is sort of an overdose. I intend to wake up as planned today and study but if I am not able to sleep tonight because of the pain, I guess I’d cancel the whole plan.

My day didn’t go on well and I’m in need of a journal or any form of writing in privacy. Okay right. John Mayer’s birthday is coming up in 2 days, on the 16th♥, Starbucks for a cake anyone? I definitely can’t go there alone since the incident of Najwa snapping her fingers in front of my face, making the barista to get the wrong idea of the situation. Went there before graduation days before and he was still very much flattering himself through out us ordering -_-

Oh well, bye.

That’s where you’re at.

Had tuition at Nirmala’s today & it was her birthday so it was cute. Okay, don’t judge me based on the words I pick for this post because I just woke up from a long nap a few minutes ago. And now we’re going to my grandmother’s place, I don’t wanna take a bath! And I have no idea what to wear. And this is the most pointless post but who cares, because I just woke up and boy, does it feel good to be able to sleep that long! (:

vivien says:
hari tu,i tgh baca people.com.and terbaca pasal billy good charlotte
vivien says:
that he’s gonna be a daddy
vivien says:
and i teringat kat u
vivien says:

Amal says:
OMGGGGGGG
Amal says:
you serious?

Vivien, how come you are always so in touch to the people I used to be obsessed with? First that dude having a new girlfriend and now Billy? But come to think of it, it’s Vivien, what sort of gossip would not go pass her? So yes, Billy’s now waiting for a baby with his wife. And he’s prepared for an Alice in Wonderland themed nursery if it’s a girl, how sweet is that? See, I always fall for the good ones! Although they don’t look too good most of the time..

Right, well, Raya is happening in no time but I have yet to get myself a pair of kurung or anything traditional whatsoevs. Thank you trials, you have proved to me that I am a little good at prioritising. Trials are gonna be over by Friday, and I insist to go out with my friends for at least dinner on that Friday. If ignored, I guess I’ll just have to drag Mum out instead. But I doubt that’d happen, I think I’d totally annoy my friends this time.

So yes, anyone free on Friday?

Okay right mal, gila annoying.

Still Missing.

I have yet to find my missing journal. It’s amazing how much the small things in life really matter to you but yet you fail to see so until it’s really gone for good. I swear I’d rather lose my handphone or any of my valuables than having to lose it. But then, I’ve already lost it so no use saying.

I have never been the sort of person who appreciates things. I go stationary shopping this week, and by the next week, all my stationaries would’ve gone missing. Things never really meant more than how they appear to me. A pen is a pen. A pencil is a pencil. A book is a book. I lose it, I get a new one. Simple. It’s definitely my first to lose something and actually feel really bummed over it. I don’t like getting hooked to my belongings to be honest, things should always be treated as things. But I guess having myself stick loads of receipts&movie tickets &tonnes off magazine cut-outs of bands, musicians &celebrities (Pete Doherty, John Mayer, Oasis, Jet, Ed Westwick, Paolo Nutini) -all from my magazine collection which took me some time to actually think if I should really cut the magazine into pieces, having to write everything I do each day in the empty spaces, having to doodle on it a lot, and stick post it notes onto the special ‘notes to self’ page I had created; doing all that, it got me to really appreciate that bloody organiser ):

I honestly miss every part of my organiser. And this time, I can’t buy it back ):

In contradiction to how I usually react when I lose my valuables (look for it a little, stress out a lot, then never give two shits about it), this time, I had actually made the effort to tell the Pak Cik Kantin to keep it for me if he sees it, make Keerthana & Charlene help me out in looking for it, told the teacher on duty about it (Thanks Keer), told all 3 discipline teachers about it, told the Head Prefect, told the Assistant Head Prefect, told the whole class.

Even when I had lost a whole bag of school exercise books and a full set of school uniform, the only thing I did was asked me classmates and no one else. It’s different this time. It meant that much to me :-S

Pikia’ said she has the photo and I’ll upload it as soon. Maybe I should post up a tribute post or something.

Oh well, if someone is nice enough and not as broke as I am right now, please buy me a new leather journal with a couple of backdated issues of Q Magazine, Mojo Magazine and SPIN Magazine (available in Kinokuniya).

Back to how school was, school was okay. Shitty during the first few hours because I wasn’t in a very good mood. And that took me to being very personal and touchy on many issues. I should really lessen down on having to look things at others’ perspective, or at least trying to. Because you never can totally figure out how a person feels about something. But nevermind, as long as I know I’ve got the right intention and as long as it’s connected to being nice and courtesies, than I guess I probably am on the right path.

Tuition was funny. I shall post a locked post if I am even in the mood for it. After tuition, I headed to Digital Mall with my dad after accompanying him to the ATM. It did make me feel a whole lot better because I managed to get my hands on 2 new music concert DVDs that I have yet to find someplace else (: He also made friends with the dude there so yeay!, that means he would be a little more keen to take me there if ever I plan to get anything.

These are the two he got me :

Ahh (:

Bye♥